Critic Cal

The produce of a week or so's worth of rather cathartic evenings back in July...                  To Their Moot Issue                 Had we but world enough, and time,                 This indecision were no crime;                 We would sit down, and think, and weigh                 The pros and cons, our long life's day.                 You'd watch the lads-turned-dads, matchside,                 With wistful awe; I, with the fried                 And frazzled mums would freak. I would                 Disdain myself a "hopeless dud",                 While you should, if you please, amuse                 Yourself with video games and booze.                 My anxious reticence would grow,                 Skirting the all-too-final "no";                 A decade more of muddled haze                 Would not one future chance erase.                 Two hundred years we'd spend in jest,                 Three thousand questionin

There's this Rowan Atkinson sketch where he does a comically solemn vicar character delivering a sermon about "The Amazing Jesus" -- And on the third day, there was a marriage in Cana of Galilee. And it came to pass that all the wine was drunk. And the mother of the bride came to Jesus and said unto the Lord, they have no more wine. And Jesus said unto the servants: "Fill six waterpots with water." And they did so. And when the steward of the feast did taste from the water of the pots, it had become wine. And they knew not whence it had come. But the servants did know, so they applauded loudly in the kitchen. And they said unto the Lord: "How the hell did you do that?" And inquired of him: "Do you do children's parties" And the Lord said: "No." But the servants did press him, saying; "Go on, give us another one!" [...] And they brought him on a stretcher a man who was sick of the palsy. And they cried unto him: