Critic Cal

And Jesus went away from there and withdrew to the district of Tyre and Sidon. And behold, a Canaanite woman from that region came out and was crying, “Have mercy on me, O Lord, Son of David; my daughter is severely oppressed by a demon.” But he did not answer her a word. And his disciples came and begged him, saying, “Send her away, for she is crying out after us.” He answered, “I was sent only to the lost sheep of the house of Israel.” But she came and knelt before him, saying, “Lord, help me.” And he answered, “It is not right to take the children's bread and throw it to the dogs.” She said, “Yes, Lord, yet even the dogs eat the crumbs that fall from their masters' table.” Then Jesus answered her, “O woman, great is your faith! Be it done for you as you desire.” And her daughter was healed instantly. ( Matthew 15:21-28 ; see also  Mark 7:24-30 )                   THE FLOOR         ...

Two churches, both alike in masonry, in fair Vancouver where we lay our scene... They were just across from our hotel, on adjacent corners of neighbouring blocks with nothing but a street between them. Geographically. And from the very first moment I saw them, I couldn't not feel uneasy. "In 1903 a second church was set up next door in order to accommodate the growing numbers of local residents desiring to share Christian fellowship together," said no local history pamphlet ever.  Indeed, as Sunday rolled around and I went online to explore my options (Mr. W having already opted for a lie-in) I was greeted with contrasting euphemisms. "We are an affirming church," reassured one. "We are a diverse community of families and singles," maintained the other. Hmm. Where to, then, for my own Sunday morning fix? Since I'm neither a family nor a single person perhaps you'd think this decision should've been easy. But, exploring the two web...

Recently, my Twitter feed threw up a YouTube nugget that kinda made me want to throw up too. It was a paean to Wayne Grudem , performed – to the tune and choreography of Greased Lightnin' – by a merry band of UCCF volunteer workers at a summer training camp a few years back. For those of you wondering what half the words in that sentence mean: Wayne Grudem is a well- and widely-respected American evangelical theologian who helped found an  organisation  working to maintain the subordination of women (and, perhaps not unrelatedly, openly  endorsed Trump ); UCCF stands for  Universities and Colleges Christian Fellowship  and is a UK-based charity overseeing a large network of student Christian Unions; a 'paean' is, as I was pleased to hazard correctly before seeking the assistance of the Internet, "a creative work expressing enthusiastic praise"; and Greased Lightnin'  is a song about a car that will help you to become more manly and to show the ladies w...

I was ten when O.J. Simpson's former wife Nicole and her friend Ron were found stabbed to death outside her LA home. It was the talk of the playground, handled with all the sensitivity and nuance that ten year olds typically bring to matters of mortality and justice. He definitely did it; he definitely didn't do it; he's best mates with my brother and he'll do it to you too if you don't give me your Kit Kat; say his name five times in a mirror and he'll come after you in your dreams in the guise of a chubby-cheeked children's toy carrying a machete... [1] I knew nothing about sport. As far as I was concerned, O.J. was just some guy on a baseball card. And I knew still less about race. Racism was black kids and white kids not wanting to play together, just like sexism was girls and boys refusing to sit next to each other. So the case made little coherent impact on me at the time. And even though I hope I've started to get the hang of a few things in r...

A tipsily cheerful, older-than-me chap in the pub where I go to write recently informed me that, d'you know, he'd walked past my table a couple of times and  he couldn't decide whether I was a man or a woman! To be fair to my new friend, I wasn't dressed as a woman. I wasn't dressed 'as' anything. I was just there in jeans and a conference hoodie – ideal for the (coldish) weather and the errand-y to-dos on my list, but hardly apt to give a person curves they don't already possess. My medium-length hair had been styled by the elements, my complexion was as even and clear as OK-ish hydration and cleansing would have it, and I hadn't so much as sketched a single facial feature. And yet, here I was outside the confines of my own home and apparently quite comfortable to be seen in public. It does seem like more the sort of thing a man would do... Not that all men choose to present themselves 'as-is', but at least it's socially acceptab...

"Larry – the indolent, the unmovable, the irrepressibly charming – just might be the most dependable political figure in the U.K. today." ( Camila Domonoske, writing for NPR ) ... LARRY: THE DOWNING STREET CAT   Larry’s the Cat at the Cabinet’s door. His title – I ought to have told you before – Is Mouser in Chief, but he’s not one to boast So “Larry” suffices, in spite of his post. His jacket is tabby, he’s sleek and well-fed, With a Chippendale chair of his own for a bed. Yet he was in his youth quite the wildest of strays – And has put on no airs since his rescue cat days. His nominal mandate he glibly defies: He’d far rather quarrel with beasts his own size. So he’s less of a terror to mice and to rats (Which infest Number 10) than to neighbouring cats. When Freya strode onto the Treasury scene Her stand for austerity stirred up his spleen; While Palmerstone, Mouser for Foreign Affairs, On account of his boss, of whom Larry despairs, Can bare...

"And so Mr Brown came to be respected even by the clan, because he trod softly on its faith. He made friends with some of the great men of the clan and on one of his frequent visits to the visiting villages he had been presented with a carved elephant tusk, which was a sign of dignity and rank. [...] Whenever Mr Brown went to that village he spent long hours with Akunna in his  obi  talking through an interpreter about religion. Neither of them succeeded in converting the other but they learned more about their different beliefs."  "Mr Brown's successor was the Reverend James Smith, and he was a different kind of man. He condemned openly Mr Brown's policy of compromise and accommodation. He saw things as black and white. And black was evil. He saw the world as a battlefield in which the children of light were locked in mortal conflict with the sons of darkness. He spoke in his sermons about sheep and goats and about wheat and tares. He believed in slaying th...